This spot is taken

Dear Amy,

My neighbor keeps parking in front of my house even though he has plenty of space in front of his own. It’s not illegal, but it’s incredibly annoying. I don’t want to start a feud, but I also don’t want to keep looking out my window and seeing his car taking up my space. How do I get him to stop?

– Territorial But Polite

Dear Territorial But Polite,

First, claim the space as your own — literally. Set up a fake historical marker that reads, “On this site in 1873, nothing of significance happened, but this is my parking spot.” 

If that doesn’t work, try drawing a chalk outline around his car every time he parks there. Maybe he’ll get the hint.

If he still doesn’t budge, escalate your tactics. Place a traffic cone in the spot, label it “VIP Parking for Someone Else,” and stand by with a clipboard, pretending to enforce an official-sounding but completely fake parking ordinance. 

If questioned, sigh deeply and say, “I don’t make the rules.”

For maximum pettiness, park your car in front of his house instead. If he complains, act confused: “Oh, I thought we were doing a parking swap! No? My bad.” Then proceed to never move your car again.

At the end of the day, is the situation annoying? Absolutely. But is it worth a neighborhood war? Probably not. 

If not having access to “your” parking spot really bothers you, have a polite conversation with your neighbor, and see if they’re even aware this is an issue for you. They might not realize it’s bugging you. 

If talking doesn’t help, you can always use subtle deterrents — like placing a garbage bin or basketball hoop near the curb — to discourage parking.

Or, just let it go. Life’s too short to spend it staring angrily at someone else’s Honda.

Best of bad advice,

Amy